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Wait, do you see my heart on my sleeve?


"I've been trying to tell you... say that it's always been me... that I am all you need... and you never want more... Seems like I love the things you do..." ~ Adele.

"And we'll say all of the right things without a clue
And you'll be the one for me and me the one for you" ~ Adele.

I love the lyrics to this song. I think it's about a relationship gone wrong but I choose to pick the lyrics that resonate in my heart.

Today was a sad day. confusing.. T and I talked about christmas gifts... I said all I really wanted was to be pregnant. nothing else. Can I just have that one thing? It's not like I don't pray for it all the time... I want it so bad.

~~~~~~~~

I'm the girl with everything... so tell me what is wrong with me?? I feel like not a soul understands how I feel.

My god the loneliness is almost too much to bear for me. I cry so easily nowadays.

I should be so happy, I truly AM the girl with everything, I should be stronger than this.. but I'm not. I feel so weak. It feels like the fight of my life.

All I have ever wanted is a family. Being an only child, I never felt like I had "that" family you see people with..

my husband is as supportive as he can be... and the friends whom are aware also try to be supportive but this is a lonely process, no matter how many times friends offer their hugs&kind words. They don't get it.

It's another long week ahead for me... I promised a friend I'd do a TV interview for their studio tomorrow night... wished I'd said NO... and I have a big presentation at work on Thursday evening that isn't prepared... I just want a day to myself to cry. My vacation is 11 days - I've prepared nothing for Orlando & we will be there 10 days. I'm not even excited.

and dear readers, I know... none... today is cd12. According to the clomid calculator, it's the week to really start trying. There is my hope. My bloodwork for the month will be 2 days before our trip so I should get a call on vacation on the status of my progesterone levels. Wish me luck!
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